Category Archive:

Road Noise: Small Car Review…er, But Not What You're Thinking

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Another week, another Road Noise brainstorming session with my friend who doesn’t even own a car.
“I was thinking of doing something about how much my nephew loves his little toy cars,” I IM’d my Cars-Are-a-Blight-On-the-Landscape collaborator.
His reply follows, verbatim:
Oh man, I LOVED toy cars as a kid, especially the micro-machine ones you could open and put other EVEN TINIER cars into! And those ones that came with a little credit card shaped bit of plastic that you could unfold and make a little landscape for your car to drive around on!
Toy cars it is, then.


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You go, girl!

Posted in: Road Noise

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Road Noise: Fuel Economy: The Most Dangerous Game

There are a bunch of ways to kill a man at the Ford Allen Park Test Labs. Exposure in the cold room, dehydration in the hot room, altitude sickness in the pressure room, boredom in the strange little parking lot simulator shed. And that’s just the stuff I can come up with off the top of my head.
Oh, and you could run someone down with the new F-150, I guess, if your imagination was lacking for some reason.


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F-150 stalks its prey from the cover of the tall grass

Posted in: Ford, Road Noise

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Road Noise: Because We Said So, That's Why!

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Another day, another mess of press releases clogging the inbox here at Vehicle Voice World Internet Headquarters and Half-Price Seafood Buffet.
Let’s see…Corporate community outreach: I’ll pass. Buy 14 tires, get the 15th free: To the Recycle Bin! Exciting new car air freshener: This isn’t news.
Oooh, here’s one: “GM launches new site to clarify misconceptions about the company.” Sounds like fun; let’s roll.

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This is gonna be like Mythbusters, but without the explosions or the entertainment.

Posted in: GM, Road Noise

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Road Noise: The Road Goes Ever On and On. And On and On and On.

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Two hours out of every day – one in the morning, and one in the evening – I drive the highways of this great country. It’s a fascinating world out there, full of interesting sights, breathtaking landscapes and novel personalities, all available to take in if you know where to look.
It gets boring after about 20 minutes.

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For hours and hours and hours.

Posted in: Road Noise

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Road Noise: Am I old enough for disdain toward the young yet?

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A lot of press releases cross my desk here at Vehicle Voice World Internet Headquarters R Us, and over the past few weeks, I’ve seen several headlined with variations on “10 Best Cars for Back to School!”
Wow. My parents got pretty worked up when they just had to lay down a hundred bucks for a graphic calculator; the concept of a back-to-school car probably would have sent my dad into a coma.

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In my day, we rode the cheese. And we liked it. You kids get off my lawn!

Posted in: Road Noise

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Road Noise: 2009 Ford Flex Woody

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Right in Our Own Backyard
On my way home from a meeting yesterday afternoon, this “beauty” caught my eye. And, yeah, I had to stop in and see how much they’re asking for it and if anyone’s actually buying them. We’ve known that the option would be available, though not supplied by Ford directly, has been floating around for a while, but this was our first in-the-vinyl-and-tin sighting.

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Though it seems that the same people who talk about how ugly such options also bemoan the use of vinyl to create a wood look over heavy, expensive, and difficult-to-maintain real wood, the Flex actually wears this niche choice as well as possible, and far better than just about any other modern-day car.

Posted in: Ford, Road Noise
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Road Noise: Greetings From the Dream Cruise!

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An event of this scale just makes one feel…insignificant.

Posted in: Road Noise

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Road Noise: Delightfully Tacky, Yet Unrefined.

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Summer’s getting on. It’s still blisteringly hot most of the time, but it’s getting dark a little earlier each night, and the great summer holidays – Memorial Day, Independence Day, my birthday – are behind us. Only the county fair stands between us and the short, quick slide into autumn.

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Positively bucolic. It can’t last.

Posted in: Road Noise

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Road Noise: No Sleep — Or Stops — Till Brooklyn

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There’s supposed to be a point in everyone’s life where you’re sitting around with some friends, and everyone’s bored at the prospect of the boring day/weekend/month ahead, and then you look around at each other, and as one, you all go “Wooooo! Road trip!” And then everyone has a life-changing coming-of-age experience. At least that’s how movies and daytime TV have sold it to me.

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They’re having fun. See, this is fun!

Posted in: Commuting, Road Noise

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Road Noise: The Green Parade

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Green technology at the Woodward Dream Cruise? Hmmm. You could fit a whole Prius under this baby’s hood, I guess.

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