Category Archive:

Blue Tuesday

1

So, first Volkswagen announces that they’re building their new plant in Tennessee, and then like two hours later, General Motors comes out with another little ray of sunshine: No more health care for salaried retirees, bonuses for nobody, and they’re closing the hell out of a bunch of plants.
You know, times have been tough, but even taking that into account, we’ve had better Tuesdays, you know?

mushroom_cloud.jpg
The manufacturing economy. (Artist’s rendering)


Continue Reading

500 Miles to Ironforge

0

On one hand, it’s the best idea in human history: Dad drives the minivan, and while little Pashley is engrossed in her Dora DVDs, mom can e-mail her sister about how ill-advised this trip is, Junior can watch a panda get hit in the junk on YouTube, and Sister can do whatever it is those damn kids do in their Facespaces or Mybooks or what have you.
On the other hand, it’s the Internet in the car. Well, there’s a brilliant plan with absolutely no flaws, don’t you think?

bttf.jpg
”DSL? Where we’re going, we don’t need DSL.”


Continue Reading

Two-Mode Hybrid: Simpler than the stupid Internet would have you believe.

0

Hokay, so. We’re talking about hybrids this week here at the VehicleVoice Interntronic Webblargh. Saving gas (and gas money) is a subject near and dear to my heart, as the more patient and visionary among you may have gathered from last week’s slightly garbled missive. This time around, let’s talk about the two-mode hybrid system that George liked so much on the Yukon earlier this week. Development of this particular system was a joint project between BMW, General Motors, Daimler, and Chrysler.

gore.jpg
That guy from Futurama approves


Continue Reading

It's an expensive world out there, kids. Just stay home.

0

omg_gas_sign.jpg

Hey, you know what I’m totally not sick of hearing about? High gas prices. Let’s talk about that.

Posted in: Commuting, Road Noise

Continue Reading

Psychotherapy With BMW's GINA Concept

So, by now you’ve seen BMW’s GINA concept car. (And if you haven’t, jeez I have to do everything around here.) Opinions here at VehicleVoice World Internet Headquarters and House of Waffles are sharply divided: Steph thinks it’s intriguing, and I think it hungers for human souls.
We were going to argue about it – you may not have noticed, but I’m only happy when I’m in a quarrel – but then I realized, “Wait, this is just what BMW wants us to do!” Because GINA isn’t so much as a car as a Rorschach test made from an umbrella frame and an old swimsuit.
Work with me here.

BMW_08_GINA_Cncpt_a.jpg
GINA: The blank slate upon which the observer inscribes her insecurities.


Continue Reading

I've got your product placement right here.

0

A highly scientific poll conducted by calling my friend Doug and asking him, “Hey, who do you think has more screen time in Iron Man: Jeff Bridges or the Audi logo?” determined recently that, yeah, there might be some product placement at work in the entertainment industry.

Q7 Iron Man.jpg
The star of Iron Man. Also pictured: Guy in a robot suit.


Continue Reading

[insert "bright future" joke here]

0

Blinky_novelty.gif
This is fun, right? We’re having fun!

Well, here we are in the World of Tomorrow. The food pills and flying cars are some ways off, but our brave boys in the trenches of science have figured out how to harness those spastic blinky necklaces (pictured) issued by law to every obnoxious child at every fireworks display and use their power for good. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, the LED headlamp.
escalade LEDs.jpg
The 2009 Cadillac Escalade Platinum blinds you with science


Continue Reading

World's Greatest Singer, Meet the World's Greatest Driver

0

singercar.jpg

It’s been proven, through complicated, peer-reviewed studies chock-full of science (I’m not going to link to them. Let’s be realistic — you weren’t going to read them anyway) that people who think they’re really good at something turn out to be not-so-great at it in reality.
You see this a lot in the audition rounds of American Idol: People who think – nay, know — that they’re the finest vocalists ever to come out of Peoria or Podunk or Sacramento or wherever. And then they sing and we all have a good laugh and nobody gets hurt, except for the idiot singer, who doesn’t count.
However, you also see this phenomenon in effect in other, not-so-harmless situations. For instance, I’ve always thought I’m a pretty good driver.

Posted in: Commuting, Road Noise

Continue Reading

Stick It To The Man

1

stick-shift-transmission.jpg

I remember the call like it came just last week, because it did.
“Katrina, I have a new car.”
“How exciting!”
“It…it has a stick shift.”
“Even better!”
“You don’t understand! I don’t know how to drive a stick. I need you to teach me.”
“You’ve made me a very happy woman, grasshopper.”


Continue Reading

How Green Was My Hybrid

0

ecokey compressed.jpg

In the spirit of up-to-the-minute analysis that separates the good blogs from the great ones, I hereby present a short essay on hybrids and automotive environmentalism in honor of Earth Day … which was three days ago.
Well, it’s the thought that counts.

Posted in: Road Noise

Continue Reading

Follow VehicleVoice

RSS Feed   Facebook   Twitter

2018 NVSS

2018 New Vehicle Satisfaction Survey
By Invitation Only


Start Survey

Membership

Join

Recent Winners

Sid P., Washington - $100
Ken G., Nevada - $100
Brad T., Wisconsin - $100
Tom M., Virginia - $100
Kathy F., New Jersey - $100
John M., Massachusetts - $100
Mike M., California - $100
Carol R., Texas - $100
James D., Georgia - $100
Martha B., New Jersey - $100
Kerry B., Pennsylvania - $100

What is VehicleVoice?

About Vehicle Voice